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Why do PCs gradually get slower with usage?

PC's would run great and blazingly fast if only a certain amount of programs that were given a green bill of health were loaded on immediately after the PC's were unboxed and never updated or removed! But that's never gonna happen. Instead programs and data are loaded on, taken off, updated (including the OS), and the nice orderly disk structure with everything in linear order is blown to hell, leading to bits of programs here, there, and everywhere.

These lead to long disk seek times, occasional disk errors requiring a reload of what the drive just did read that requires a buffer flush and reinit, not to mention programs coded by lazy wannabes that don't follow the very explicitly stated rules for where they can be placed and which memory areas they can access and how they are to remove themselves, leading to memory leaks flooding out buffers, data placed haphazardly in places it shouldn't be, program code left on the drive from so long ago even BYTE magazine can’t remember the name of that deleted program, and so on, and don’t get me started about device drivers WRITTEN BY ENGINEERS INSTEAD OF CODED BY PROGRAMMERS, cheap USB devices that hang on a request and freeze the entire system, io drivers that - well, you get the idea.